IFS is an acronym you may have heard thrown around in reference to therapy. The acronym stands for Internal Family Systems and it is a therapy model developed by Dr. Dick Schwartz. I was originally introduced to this model by reading the book "No Bad Parts." I loved the book. I almost instantly felt easier in my heart knowing that there was a therapy model like this out there, and that I could learn it and eventually practice it with my clients.
What differentiates this model from other models of therapy is the premise that the mind/psyche is composed of parts. Dr. Schwartz shares that in working with clients who struggled with disordered eating, he discovered that many of them described different parts of themselves. For example a client may say something like: "a part of me knows I don't want to binge and purge, but another part of me feels like I have to." Dr. Schwartz astutely gathered that these were indeed different parts of the client, and began working with the parts in a systematic way.
While working this way may seem strange and confusing at first (is my therapist thinking I have multiple personalities?), it is not so different from our general way of talking to one another. We may say things in our everyday life like, "part of me wants to go to the party, but another part really wants to stay home." We have a general awareness that we have parts and that there can be polarity between parts of ourselves.
In working with an IFS therapist, you will delve a little deeper into the parts, and begin to give them voice. As you do this, you may discover (quite unexpectedly!) that the parts have things to say, and often evoke emotions and imagery. The parts may also have profound "jobs" in your life. As you begin to flesh these things out, you are beginning your relationship with your parts, and thusly are no longer a one-dimensional being, you are the multi-dimensional self that you have always been.
This is where my relief in learning about the model came in... there were so many parts of myself that were longing to be acknowledged, and not all of them could fit into the experience of one part of me. In noticing the different parts of myself there was a sort of permission to feel many ways about one thing, and even to hold polarity between parts of myself. It is my hope as an IFS informed and (soon to be IFS certified) therapist that I can help others to connect with parts of themselves that are longing to be seen and heard, as well as perhaps the ones that are staying hidden. In my therapy room, all parts are welcome.
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